002 – DIVORCE – STEP BY STEP PROCESS AND DIVORCE OPTIONS EXPLAINED

A step by step guide to the divorce process. Family Law expert Antonia Felix talks us through the options and routes you can take. Myths busted, top tips and questions answered. Antonia Felix is a Partner in the Family Law team at renowned law firm Mishcon de Reya. Antonia was named by Citywealth as one of the top 100 private client lawyers in 2021.
https://www.mishcon.com/people/antonia-felix/

Lisa Conway-Hughes is a Chartered Financial Adviser, a Fellow of the Personal Finance Society and founder of LCH/WEALTH. Lisa regularly posts financial information, education and updates on her hugely popular Instagram account:
https://www.instagram.com/misslollymoney/

Book a one to one Financial Diagnosis with LCH/WEALTH here:
https://lchwealth.co.uk/lch_wealth_services/one-to-one-financial-diagnosis/

This content is to be used for information and educational purposes only and nothing contained in it is or is intended to be construed as individual financial advice. Financial advice must only be given on an individual basis. If you require legal advice, financial advice or any other expert assistance, you should seek the services of a competent and qualified professional.

Show Transcript

Podcast Transcript: Navigating Divorce with Antonia Mee of Mishcon de Reya, Hosted by Lisa Conway-Hughes

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
How do you start divorce proceedings? How long does it take? And then, let’s talk about the money. There are lots of different ways to go about it, but what you want to avoid is years later thinking, “I wish I’d thought about that.”

Welcome to today’s show—we’re talking all about divorce and how to navigate it, busting myths along the way. We’ve got loads of questions and practical tips from a top expert.

Joining me today is Antonia Mee, a partner at the family law firm Mishcon de Reya. That’s the firm famous for helping Princess Diana with her divorce, and Antonia is also featured in the Tatler Address Book—so we are most definitely in safe hands.

Antonia Mee:
Thanks for having me.

Starting Divorce Proceedings

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
Should we start at the beginning? How do you actually start divorce proceedings? You always see the race to the solicitor in the films—is that real?

Antonia Mee:
Not so much anymore. These days, there’s a portal that makes it much easier. You just go online—21st-century style. It’s not as dramatic as in films unless there’s a reason to serve papers personally, like if you’re worried someone won’t engage.

Generally, it’s done on the portal and is pretty painless compared to how it used to be.

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
So if I’m in the UK and my husband is too, I can just go online?

Antonia Mee:
Yes. You can do it yourself or ask a solicitor to do it for you. You can even apply jointly if you’re on good terms. You just need your marriage certificate—if you’ve lost it, you can order a new one from where you got married.

Non-Court Dispute Resolution

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
Let’s talk non-court dispute resolution. I hear lots of terms but don’t always know what they mean.

Antonia Mee:
It’s a whole spectrum. When I started 20 years ago, people would issue court proceedings straight away. Now, there are several options:

  • Mediation: A third-party mediator helps you reach an agreement but doesn’t give legal advice.
  • Arbitration: A private, binding alternative to court where an arbitrator (often a judge) makes a decision. You both sign up and agree to be bound by the outcome.
  • Collaborative Law: You each have a collaborative lawyer, and all parties work together to find a solution.
  • One Lawyer for Both Parties: In specific circumstances, a single lawyer can act for both.
  • Private FDR (Financial Dispute Resolution): A judge provides a non-binding indication of what a court would likely decide, to help with settlement.

These options can save time, money, and stress—especially when compared to court.

How to Choose a Solicitor

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
How do you know which solicitors offer these options?

Antonia Mee:
Look for those registered with Resolution, which lists lawyers trained in various approaches. Check bios and always ask at the first meeting what your options are.

Grounds for Divorce

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
What are the current grounds for divorce?

Antonia Mee:
It’s now a no-fault divorce system. You simply state that the marriage has irretrievably broken down. You must have been married at least a year, but you don’t need to prove wrongdoing like adultery anymore.

How Long Does Divorce Take?

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
If both parties agree, how fast can it be done?

Antonia Mee:
Even if you’re fast, there’s a mandatory five-month cooling-off period. So the quickest you’ll be divorced is about six to seven months. But you can still agree on finances and childcare during that time.

Some people do change their minds during this period—it’s rare, but it happens. You can stop proceedings any time before the final order.

Costs of Divorce

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
What’s the most affordable way to divorce?

Antonia Mee:
You can do it yourself. The government fee is £593. But even in simple cases, it’s wise to get legal advice to avoid costly regrets down the line. That’s especially true when dividing assets or if one party might come into money later.

For example, the Vincent White case involved someone who didn’t get a binding financial order, and years later, their ex came back for more.

So whether you spend a couple of thousand pounds or a lot more depends on:

  • How much you argue
  • What assets you have
  • How complicated the financial picture is

Emotional Costs & Support

Antonia Mee:
A big part of divorce is emotional. Some people use the legal process to deal with pain or resentment. That’s why it’s vital to get support from therapists and financial advisers—not just lawyers. It’s healthier and often cheaper.

I always tell clients—don’t spend your money with me talking about your feelings. Talk to a professional who’s trained to help.

Lisa Conway-Hughes:
This has been incredibly helpful. I’m sure anyone considering divorce has learned loads. Thank you so much, Antonia.

Antonia Mee:
Thank you for having me.

Podcast: Money Lessons with Lisa Conway-Hughes
Guest: Antonia Mee, Partner at Mishcon de Reya